The Sad but Instructive Tale of Seymour the Femur

Seymour the Femur was a dreamer,
Did not like his place.
Said to the pelvis, "You're not Elvis,
Get out of my face!"

Moaned to the body, "This is shoddy!
I bear half your weight,
Bent am I, it's hard on a guy!
I don't like my fate!"

Tillie Tibia said, "Shut up!
You're nuts like that cat Felix!
I go jogging or Irish clogging,
Get bent into a helix!"

Patty Patella spoke up then.
"You know your jobs, at least!
Look at me, just capping the knee,
And for the eyes, no feast!"

Joe the Toe, Tammy Tarsus,
Cal the Cuboid joined the fight,
All the bones were throwing stones,
And this went on all night.

"Hey, what of US?" said Moe the Muscle.
"We're the ones for your motility!
Pects and Biceps, Glutes and Triceps,
No us? – impossibility!"

"Who's the one who makes you move?
Me and my nerves!" said Brian the Brain.
"I'm the globe that's got the lobes,
I'm the one who drives the train!"

"So what?" cried Ellie Epidermis,
"I protect you all from harm,
Puncture me and you'll sure see
You have sold the farm!"

"I'm a nothing?" said Steve the Stomach.
"How do you think you all stay well?!"
Then Louie Liver, Katie Kidney,
Pammy Pancreas raised –a yell.

"Quit the fighting!" said Seymour Femur.
"I only wanted a change of place --
Get out of this socket, go up in a rocket,
And see some outer space!"

Huey the humorous Humerus said,
"Seymour, you tweaked on meth?
There'll be no sky, you're in the thigh,
And there you'll stay till death!"

"All you others, you shut up too!
"This noise is astronomical!
Read One Cor Twelve, the fighting shelve!"

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(So ends verse anatomical.)